The Fuduna Fanclub

Well, here they are! Zodiac signs... Fuduna™ style!

January:

A glowing cereal bowl!

February:

 A fully loaded handgun!

March:

A hideous slug! 

April: 

 A box of tissue!! (Used tissue if you were born on an even numbered day)

May:

 A razor blade! (Used by emos worldwide!)

June:

 Yes, a cube. Too bad you're not a sphere! They're awesomer.

July:

 Some weird bacon-type band aids! Lucky you!

August:

 A Hammertime Stop Sign! That's so cool!

September:

 Some kinda dead bear rug!

October:

 A pimpin' Honda Civic! It may have a spoiler, but that doesn't make it a sports car!

November:

 A beautiful, majestic, muscly centaur! Everyone will want to date you!

December: 

FURRY LEG WARMERS!!! Groovy! With varying colors! Pink for girls, black for guys born on even numbered days, white for guys on odd numbered days!